


My Immortal

by orphan_account



Category: Supernatural
Genre: AU, Castiel is Dean and Sam's little brother, Dean and Sam and Cas are hunters, Flashbacks, Human Castiel, Implied Sexual Content, Multi, POV Benny, POV Castiel, POV First Person, Protective Older Brothers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-02-17
Updated: 2014-05-13
Packaged: 2018-01-12 21:22:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 10,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1201138
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>-Same time, different place-</p>
<p>Season 8 based alternate universe where Cas is the youngest Winchester brother (full not half), and the trio are fighting through a nest of vamps, and Cas gets separated from the group. He's helped by a stranger named Benny Lafitte.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Standing Too Close to the Flames

We never imagined there would be this many vampires in one nest, or that the nest would be so large. We never imagined that, inside, we'd get separated. My brothers told me, there's a lot of vamps in this building, if we get split up, someone's pulling the go. That someone being Dean. Dean would blow up the nest. Not only did it take care of the vampires cleanly and efficiently, it was extremely exciting. But when we got split up this time, when Dean sent off the signal that the place was about to explode, I was trapped. Bound in some dungeon beneath the nest. There's blood, and bones, and corpses, and the shackles holding me down are in great condition. I feel like calling for help, I can imagine it. Dean and Sam get outside, notice I'm not there. They begin to panic, but the bomb's been set. There's no way out, no way in. No time. Dean shouts profanities at losing yet another younger brother, and Sam holds back his tears, letting Dean blow off his steam. Dean would hit something, Sam would look for a way to bring me back... It's the Winchester way. I get the painful resonating feeling that I'm going to die here. That after everything -angels, demons, the works- I, Castiel Winchester, would die in a vampire nest. I was hoping it would be something else, like demons. Unlike my brothers, I've yet to die by demons, by anything actually. I've yet to die.

It's actually kind of disappointing.

I hear the familiar noise of a fight outside the doors. My ears perk, and I crane my head to get a better look. No dice. Then I feel a hand on my chest, and, full of panic, I quickly look to whomever touched me. A man, closely cut blond hair, blue eyes, is standing over me, and he's fiddling with a key in the lock of my shackles. I'm tempted to ask him why he's here, why he's helping me, but I can't get anything out. He holds a finger to his mouth, making me immediately praise my lack of words. My shackles are undone, and the man hauls me up, putting me solidly on my feet. His attention dances briefly away, and I look at him in confusion. That brief moment of wonder is interrupted when he pushes me down into a corner and shelters my body with his. This is when the flames of the explosion have rushed past the doors. He's holding me closely to him, cradling me and protecting me from the biting flames. I can only imagine how the world looks around us in this moment. A mass of yellows and oranges, paired with red and white and possibly some purple, depending on how hot the flames are. And when they're gone he pulls away, looking over me, and I can't take my eyes away from his.

"You saved my life." I say, in an equal amount of shock, surprise, and awe. I can see the expression change from concern to an odd type of joy when his eyes meet mine. I know how I must look to him, absolutely dishevelled.

"Yeah." He says, in a surprising and thick southern accent. "So I did." Neither of us move for a moment, then he stands and holds out a hand so I can follow, and I do. I glance over him, noticing singed parts of his clothing.

"Are you alright?" I ask, meeting his eyes again, and he nods, the sort of 'yeah, everything's fine, Cas, we didn't start the Apocalypse' I got from my brothers. "You sure?" Because when they look at me like that it's because A) the Apocalypse did start, and it's all their faults. B) Dean went to Hell, and there's nothing we can do [believe me, both me and Sam tried numerous times]. Or C) Dad's on a hunting trip and hasn't been home in a few days. The man's look shifts from 'Everything's fine' to 'Yes, I'm sure, stop bothering me about it.' I shrug.

"Well, do you know the way out? Who knows what the explosion did to the building." I cross my arms over my chest. For a moment, I get the feeling that the man may have been regretting the decision of saving my life, but that's one regret he'll just have to live with.

"There's gonna be a bit of rubble at both doors. Explosions are a lot of flame and quakes. It's a good thing we were in the far basement; it could have been a lot worse." The man turns away from me and goes to check a door, rattling it, and it doesn't open. He tries to use his body to open it, shoving. "Damn." He mutters, before turning back. "Who brought you down here?" I pause There seems to be a fade in my memory, so I shook my head.

"I don't know." I say then. "The last thing I remember... My brothers and I had just gotten separated... And I was fighting..." I could see the man bristle for a moment. "Who are you?" He relaxes again.

"Benny. You?" His name fits him, really, and if anything, I'm surprised I didn't guess it earlier. And I notice that when he relaxes, you can see it rippling through his body, and in his eyes.

"Cas." I say. My nickname is much better than my full. Castiel, what mixed reactions I'd gotten from the name in school. His mouth twitches into a slight smile.

"Nice to meet you, Cassie." He says then. I close my eyes, only Dean or Sam can call me Cassie.

"Just Cas." I reply. He nods then, and goes to the other door, trying it, and he's able to get it open a little, with a large crumbling noise.

"Damn." He says again, before shaking his head. "Let's hope your brothers heard that." And if in response to his words, I hear Dean's voice, which propels me to the door.

"Cas!" He calls, sounding like it came from down a destroyed hallway.

"Dean!" I call back, wrestling with the door. From the corner of my eye, I can see Benny struggle with the door as well, and he seems to be much stronger than he looks. The door opens a little more, and I'm able to crawl through, before turning.

"Benny, can you get through?" I ask him through the opening.

"You go on." He waves me off, but I shook my head, before reaching in.

"Come on!" I shout.

"Cas!" Dean calls.

I finally feel Benny's hand wrap around my wrist, and I use every ounce of strength to pull him through the crumbling opening. Then I fell Dean's hands pulling me back by my shoulders. I keep my grip on Benny, and Dean keeps shouting at me, keeps pulling me back, and I'm able to pull Benny through. Dean looks at him.

"Cas, who's this?" He's glaring, and so is Benny.

"Dean, calm down. He saved my life." A fact that I thought was clear by his singed clothing. Dean's expression softens, but remains like steel.

"Thanks for that." He says, but pulls me behind him. "But you hafta leave now."

"Dean, please." I scowl at him, and Benny moves around us, patting my shoulder as he passes. 

"See you again, little one." He says, before leaving, and I look over at Dean.

"In case you didn't notice, Cas. That guy was a vampire." He pulls me through the building, obviously angry with me.

"In case you didn't notice, Dean. He saved my life." I argue. "Doesn't that even matter anymore? Doesn't it mean anything to you that I'm the only Winchester who hasn't died yet?" Dean stops and looks me in the eye.

"Cas, believe me. I'm grateful, but 'e's still a vamp, still a monster. We can't trust 'im." He says. Now c'mon, let's get you to sleep, cause you're still my kid brother." He ruffles my hair, and we duck under the damage.


	2. The Only Winchester Who Hasn't Died (Yet)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Musings of the Winchesters' pasts.
> 
> Dean and Cas make it back to the motel before loosely explaining to Sam what happened.
> 
> (Also, Dean makes a pop culture reference)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lots of flashback in this Chapter, just wanted a little background, since I messed up canon, but still going off it.

A couple years ago, Dad went missing. It feels like ages, after everything we've been through, after the Apocalypse, after both of my brothers going to Hell. After Crowley setting the Leviathans loose. After Rachel taking in Sam's insanity. The Angels say that the Winchesters go through people like an author goes through paper. A little trail of bodies of everyone who ever helped us. Our first Angel, Virgil, was killed by Raphael for standing against him while Dean and I tried to stop Sam from killing Lilith. Then came Samandriel, and he helped us during the Apocalypse, only to be killed by Lucifer. Then we got Balthazar, who clearly hadn't got the message that we were bad news, and he started the whole situation with the Titanic... He was also killed by Raphael, in the end. Near the end of the Leviathan problem, Rachel showed up, and she took on Sam's insanity, and also ended up in Purgatory. At least she saved Dean from the same fate beforehand. Sam left after that, and it was just me and Dean. We hunted that year. When we weren't looking for Kevin, we hunted. I didn't have much time, except for the every now and then, since we'd interrogate demons to find Kevin, Dean would leave the room, chasing after a new clue, and I would have time to ask about Meg.

Don't get me wrong, I never  _ever_ had feelings for Meg, not like that. But when we were going after Roman, her and I had some time, and she became my best friend. It was loyalty between friends that kept me looking for her, even when Dean had forgotten.

}-= **x** **=-** {

It was at the hospital that I got to sit down and talk to Meg. I'd stayed behind to watch over Rachel, and apparently, she got the same idea. We were outside, the three of us, and Rachel was watching the bees. Meg was acting as a nurse then, and I was acting as Rachel's brother. Keeping close watch on Rachel, we would talk. She would tell me stories of anything she remembered, and I'd tell her what she missed. Meg certainly thought it was interesting, how I evaded Death so easily. She gave me the title: "So what does that make you?  _The Only Winchester Who Hasn't Died_?" I smiled at that.

"Yet." I had said, taking into consideration the insanity that could become the the future. Meg smiled and nodded.

"Yet." She agreed.

There was one night that one night, when a storm was raging outside, and Rachel bolted upright from her sudden comatose state. Meg and I both knew that something was happening, so Meg called Dean while I watched over Rachel. She hardly moved, but when she did, she looked at me, and pressed my nose.

"Boop." She whispered with a smile. I looked over at Meg, who shrugged. Who would have guessed that Rachel would wake from her coma as insane as ever.

"Do you think she's seeing Lucifer anymore?" I asked Meg one day after the storm. We were in the garden of the centre again, and Rachel was lying back, her blonde hair spread on the grass. She had a honeybee resting on her knuckle, and Meg and I were on a bench to the side.

"Doesn't seem like it. She's a lot less jumpy than she was when we were sure she was." She answered, legs crossed and resting comfortably on the back. She checked her phone frequently, waiting for word from Sam or Dean. "Isn't it a bit odd... Who decided we were fit for angel babysitters?" I almost smirked, remembering what Balthazar had said once.  _'I suppose that makes me the pizza man. What does that make you, Meg?'_ I wondered if she remembered him. Probably not.

"Dean." I said plainly, keeping an eye on Rachel, since she stood now and began to chase after the bees. Meg chuckled beside me.

"Right." She shook her head. "God knows why we trust that idiot." I shoved her playfully at that.

"He's still my brother, Meg." I said, nose scrunched. She laid down, head resting in my lap.

"Still don't care, Clarence." She teased, gently knocking her fist against my jaw. I smiled and shook my head.

"I don't know who Clarence is." I told her, and she laughed, an honest laugh.

"Would it kill you to read a book or watch a movie?" She poked my face, and I looked down to her.

"Theoretically, yes." I replied, and she shook her head before sitting up, and checked her phone again.

"They should be here by tonight." She said, and searched for Rachel. She wasn't too far off, and Meg whistled, getting her attention.

That night, my brothers showed up again, and the world I'd gotten to know with Meg and Rachel became the crap life of a hunter yet again.

}-= **x** **=-** {

I remember Famine. That was certainly one of the more strange experiences. We were affected, demon blood, burgers, but Samandriel's affliction really took the cake. He was our Angel, and he was consuming copious quantities of alcohol. Dean and Sam looked at each other when he first appeared, and Samandriel dropped himself onto the motel's couch. He was blinking slowly, and I sat beside him, rubbing his shoulders. It was similar to the bond Virgil and Dean shared, a Profound Bond, if nothing else.

"Where have you been?" Dean had asked Samandriel, and he looked up at him, with his eyes glazed.

"On a bender." He snapped. I found that it was fairly humorous how Samandriel acted while he was drunk, most of his time was spent sleeping on my shoulder, unnerving to a degree, since angels aren't supposed to sleep. They don't get drunk either, so I guess we've broken the world.

}-= **x** **=-** {

Broken the world. Which reminds me of that time Gabriel sent us to TV land. It felt like Gabriel was having way too much fun with it. Me. I was a nurse on Doctor Sexy MD, which was fine, I guess. But I was the co-host on Nutcracker. In a little red devil outfit and fishnets.

I swear, Gabriel hates me.

Not only because of Nutcracker, but because of the herpes commercial. Yes, Sam had to say 'I have genital herpes.' But I wasn't even with the guys playing basketball, I was with the older man, and he was eyeing me. I imagine a spouse would have been in my shoes, if I wasn't there. I don't see why I was dragged into it. I wasn't the one who was the vessel for Michael or Lucifer. His reasoning for me, or at least he said, was that I was the one holding them back. Is that really a good reason to put me in fishnets? The sitcom was one of the better roles he gave me because I was with Sam. I remember saying: "Damn, you're gonna need a bigger mouth." Samandriel showed up a couple times, but Gabriel always sent him away.

}-= **x** **=-** {

On the way back to the motel, Dean keeps glancing back at me through the rear-view mirror. I know he wants to say something, and I know it's confrontational by the way he's avoiding it. He doesn't turn on the radio, and the drive is silent and awkward. The atmosphere of the car is suffocating, and when we get back to the motel, the silence isn't stifled, but I'm able to collapse onto the couch.

"Nice to see you're alive, Cas." Sam says, and I look over at him. "We were worried. When Dean went in, I wasn't sure what he'd find." I smile at him.

"I'm fine. Thanks for your concern, Sam. I thought I would die. Being locked up and all, but everything's fine." I say.

"Thanks to Benny, right?" Dean says, and Sam's eyebrows knit.

"Benny?"

"He helped me get out before Dean found me." Then I directed my words to Dean. "If it weren't for him, I would be dead." Dean rolls his eyes.

"Whatever you say, Buffy." Then turns away again. I scoff.

"You're being so open-minded, Dean. It's incredible." I say sarcastically, and Dean shrugs.

"Whatever you say, Cassy."


	3. Bon Mardi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Benny and Cas begin to bond over issues of the family and Purgatory.
> 
> [All in all  
> You expect the wise to be wiser  
> Fallen from grace and  
> All and all I guess we should have known  
> Better 'cause
> 
> What about us  
> Isn't it enough  
> No we're not in paradise  
> This is who we are  
> This is what we've got  
> No it's not our paradise  
> But it's all we want  
> And it's all that we're fighting for  
> Though it's not paradise]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes. I finally figured out how many chapters this is going to be, and what the plot is. It's only thickening now.

After the night, we got our stuff together and left for the road. A long few hours of driving, and we were in Maine. No cases there that I'd heard so far, so why we were here was beyond me. I got time away, walking alone at night, sitting by the shore.

"Hey, little one." I hear Benny say, and I look back, giving him a sort of smile. "What brought you up here?" I shook my head.

"We were just driving, needed a place to spend the night. No cases... Unless you've been up to something." I say, and he sits next to me on the little stone wall overlooking the beach. He gives a little laugh.

"I don't plan on it." He says, looking over at me. "How're you feelin'?"

"Me? I'm fine." I turn my gaze back to the ocean, then feel Benny's hand rest on my shoulder.

"You sure, little one? Nothin' goin' wrong? Feelin' isn't just physical, y'know." He says, and I look back at him.

"I'm sure. Any rift in my life right now... They're not your concern."

"Somethin' goin' on with the brothers, I know the look." He nudges me, and my eyes dart to him.

"Just a little misunderstanding. I was standing in your defense against Dean, and now we're not really talking." I tell him. That's what it's gotten to. Dean refuses to talk to me, and Sam is stuck in the middle of it. Benny rubs my shoulder.

"He'll come around, little one." He says, and I shrug, leaning into his warm hand. Against the night, it's an extremely welcome touch.

"I don't know, Benny." I say. "Dean's stubborn." Suddenly, my mind thinks back to Madison, how it was Dean who convinced Sam to pull the trigger. How it could be Dean who will convince me to pick up the blade. No. No, Sam loved Madison. It's not the same thing. I'm  _not_ in love with Benny.

"Doesn't mean you can't beat him. You're a hunter, Cas, in the age of angels and demons. You've fought bigger things." He says, encouragingly. I smile a little, remembering how Crowley was under the influence of Purgatory souls. Hadn't some of them escaped? I banish the thought. That's impossible. How could they have.

"I'm not the one who can talk... Sam is. I can deal with it. Dean's going to stop being such an assbutt sooner or later, so I can wait." I reply, then think back to the dismissed musing. "What do you know about Purgatory?" Benny looks at me in surprise.

"Why do you ask that, little bird?" He asks, and I shrug before quickly making up something. Not a lie. I tried that once, and it ended horribly.

"I have a friend there. Her name is Rachel... I was just wondering if you knew anything..." I say, scattered. Benny shrugs.

"I know it's where I'll go when I die. I know it ain't the best place in afterlifes, but it's betta than Hell. I'm bettin' on that bein' the case." He says, and I nod.

"But for an angel... If it isn't exactly paradise for monsters, how must it be for angels?" I run my hands through my hair. "Oh God, Rachel. She trusted us, and we got her into Purgatory." Benny moves his hand to my other shoulder, so his arm is stretched behind my neck, and pulls me against him.

"There ain't nothin' you should be worryin' about, alouette." He mutters. "Yer friend Rachel's a big strong angel, and I'm sure she can handle herself in Purgatory." He starts rubbing my shoulder, and I relax into his chest, my arms go around him. A sigh. Given an adequate amount of time from this moment, I could recant a thought.  _I'm not in love with Benny._ Not now anyway, but you never really know what the future will bring. He lowers his head, and I feel his nose in my hair. I turn my head so my forehead is pressed into his shoulder. He's so warm. But I move back, and he does a quick sweep with his fingers through my hair, pushing it back. Our eyes lock for a moment, before I stand from the wall.

"Thank you." I say, glancing back. He shrugs.

"It's nothing. See you again, little bird." He gives something of a smile, and I walk away.

}-= **x** =-{

I thought he was dead. Dean shakes his head, sitting at the table, while Sam sets his cellphone on it. There'd been a text.

_I'm gonna find you._

I thought he was dead. I thought Sam had killed him. I could've sworn I saw it with my own eyes. But it was true. Vengeance wasn't an issue, who would avenge him? Gordon Walker was alive, and he was coming after Sam again. Dean runs his hand through his hair.

"I can't fucking believe it." He mutters, shaking his head. You'd think with the amount of times they've died and come back to life, it would be a little more believable. I wish we knew where he was. I wish we knew what he was planning.

"How is he even alive?" Sam wonders aloud. _Who in their right mind would being Gordon Walker back to life?_ When he was a hunter, he was reckless, leaving corpses behind. He was clever, hiding that bomb in the house. He was annoying, always trying to kill Sam. I was almost relieved when he became a vampire, it would leave a lot less guilt when we killed him. And we did. Or, Sam did. And it was  _awesome._ Sam's phone buzzes again, and he checks it.

"Shit." He mutters. "He's here." Dean takes out his gun and cocks it.

"Where is this sonuva bitch?" He growls. Sam shakes his head.

"Outside. He said he can see us." Another buzz. "He followed Cas here." I feel myself flush. Dammit.

"How is he here?" I ask. "We saw him die." Sam shrugs.

"With how many times we've died and come back to life, I don't see how it shouldn't happen for him too." He says, and Dean leans back.

"I keep sayin', what's dead should stay dead." He says. "That goes for bastards like Gordon." I purse my lips.

"If what's dead stays dead, then what about you two?" I point out. "Isn't that a little hypocritical?" Dean glares at me. Never mind then. "Has he said if he's come back human, or if he's still a vampire?"

"No, but I'm assuming he came back human... Call it hope, I guess." Sam says. "No matter what, I don't think anything will ever keep me from killing him again, even if he's human."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~Kudos and Comments are a girl's best friends~


	4. Caution To The Wind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Benny and Cas bond some more, and there's a flashback to some of Cas's past.

"He's alive." It feels like I already knew that, before Sam got any of the texts. I knew that Gordon Walker was haunting our steps the moment I woke up in that dungeon. And how much our lives suck, he's not going to be human. And how much our lives rock, we're going to send his ass back to Purgatory.

Benny's arm is around my shoulders; I appreciate how that we hardly know each other, that he has know idea who I'm talking about, but he stays and comforts me.

"I'll tell you again, little bird." He says. "You've fought bigger. You've fought harder. You can do this, Cas." Benny stays close, nestling into my hair.

But he's right. I can deal with him. I've dealt with worse. Not only had my brothers and I had to handle Heaven and Hell, Crowley and Purgatory, Dick Roman and Azazel, but alone, I've fought in my own way against Heaven.

}-= **x** =-{

When we took the case of the girl from the mental hospital who went missing, we didn't know what would unfold. Anna and I were in Bobby's safe room. She smiled at me, sitting on the bed, while I sat across on a chair.

"You're fascinating, Castiel." She muttered, turning my hand over in hers. Our eyes locked.

"How so?" I watched her. We'd never come across a fallen angel before her, so we really didn't know what to do, especially with Virgil and Uriel after her.

"You don't know, do you? You haven't figured it out." She smiled again. "Don't you hear things sometimes, Castiel? Don't you know things before your brothers do?" She pulled on my hand. "Cas. You really don't know, do you?"

"How should I know why I hear these voices or have these dreams? Anna. What don't I know?" I closed my hand around hers, and that's where her gaze went.

"You fell too, Cas." She said, and I remember the feeling of my heart plummeting in my chest. "We fell together. We rebelled together." I remember shaking my head in disbelief. Me? An angel? How the Hell do I even qualify? I remember Anna placing her hand on my cheek and making me look her in the eye.

"Castiel." She said. "The brilliant angel of Thursday, who was too brilliant for his own good. He became disillusioned, much as I did, with Heaven. He began to question and doubt. Was it God giving our orders? Or was it the Archangels? Castiel was a seraph, my superior, and when I started asking questions, he came to me. Zachariah thought he would kill me, as was ordered, but he took my hand, looked deeply into my eyes, and together, we fell. Four falling stars in the night." Something changed in her eyes then. "Let me help you find your Grace. Let us become angels together again. As we fell, so we shall rise." I closed my eyes then.

"I'm sorry, Anna. I can't. I need to stay here. Look after my brothers. I hope you understand." She'd nodded.

"I do understand." She said. "And I hope to see you again in Heaven. In the Eternal Tuesday Afternoon you once favored. In this very coat." She smiled and stood.

}-= **x** =-{

I stood with Anna against Uriel, my gun pointed at him, and Anna stood behind me. Uriel glared at us.

"Why are you protecting her, Winchester? What do you owe someone you've just met?" He said, his voice grating. I scoffed.

"But you know for a fact we haven't just met. In fact, we've known each other for a very long time. If I order you not to kill her, being a seraph and all, what would you do?" Uriel looked at me as if I'd just punched him, and he was rearing to punch back.

"A  _Fallen_ seraph, Castiel." He growled. "I take no orders from you." I shrugged and cocked my gun, aiming it at his chest.

"You must admit, though. It was worth a try." I had said.

It ended when I pulled the trigger on my gun, hitting his chest, where his sternum was. I never miss my target, and now was certainly not an exception. The bullet flew into Uriel's amulet, one he'd carelessly shown us earlier, displaying Anna's Grace, and my bullet set it free. It snaked towards Anna, and I remember her cries for us to shield our eyes, and then I remember how empty the barn was with just Sam, Dean, and me, since Uriel had fled while Anna regained her Grace.

"Why did you stand up like that, Cas?" Dean asked me once we were back at Bobby's house. I looked at him, and smiled.

"Because I saw the way you looked at her. I saw the way she tried to protect you, and you tried to protect her. I haven't seen you look at anyone like that since... Hell, I've never seen you look at anyone like that. So I had to." I shrugged, and Dean patted my back.

"Thanks, Cas." He said. "But you do know she's an angel now, and that kind of stuff has to be forbidden." I laughed.

"Yeah, I should have thought of that."

}-= **x** =-{

"I can." I say with a nod, breaking away from Benny a little. He smiles at me, and hesitates on something. I look at him, brows knit.

"What?"

"Ah, fuck it." He mutters, as he grabs my collar and pulls me to him. To be honest, it's awkward, even for me. It's clumsy and awkward, and quite possibly the best kiss I've ever had. My arms go around him, and I tilt my head so my nose isn't mashed into his face. His grip loosens on my jacket and moves his arms around me, around my waist. When I finally need to breathe, I pull away and look into his eyes, hardly remembering when I closed them.

"Damn." He mutters and kisses me again, softer, not quite as hungrily this time. This one is shorter, and I stand after it, hesitantly moving away.

"I have to go." I say, before turning to walk back to the motel, ruffling my hair on the way.


	5. The Only Thing Worse Than Falling In Love Is Figuring It Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Cas wrestles with his feelings for Benny, and Benny makes a very important decision.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A bit shorter chapter, and I apologize. Next one's a bit longer, I promise.
> 
> (Features lyrics from Enter Sandman)

We left a day after Benny kissed me. I didn't see him after that, at all. Maybe he was ashamed of what he'd done. Kissing another man wasn't exactly something they applauded in the early 20th century. Still isn't, not really. Metallica flows through the car, always the same five tapes.

 _Exit light_  
Enter night  
Take my hand  
Off to never never land

Dean hums along, tapping the steering wheel in time with the drums. Sam looks out the window absently, and I relax in the back, tapping my foot in time with the rhythm. Dean said we were heading south west, and coming from Maine, we could be heading anywhere.

 _Hush little baby, don't say a word_  
And never mind that noise you heard  
It's just the beast under your bed,  
In your closet, in your head

My eyes drift to the passing scenery, maybe to distract my mind from remembering the Heaven-paralleled feeling of Benny's mouth on mine.

_He did kiss you first. Who knows how long he wanted to. He acted like he threw all caution to the wind with it. God, but when he kissed me. I didn't know I wanted to until then. I didn't know how badly I wanted to. But he disappeared. I don't think I'll see him again, tell him how I feel. How do I feel? Feelings are hard, I know. Feelings are too hard. I like talking to him, I like when he holds me, I like his eyes. Who am I kidding? His eyes are beautiful, a crisp icy blue. His touch is intoxicating, and his voice is like drowning. But in a good way. Dammit. I've only just met him. I can't- I shouldn't-. In the words of Benny, ah, fuck it. I may be in love with a vampire I've just met._

}-= **x** =-{

He knew they'd be leaving town, and he saw Cas at the wall, but he couldn't bring himself to go over there. If he'd gone over there, who knows what he would have don. The only thing keeping him sane was that brief distance between them, but now he can feel it, a pull. He takes a deep breath. The only thing keeping him sane. Damn, he just can't keep those lips out of his mind. Doesn't even know how he would describe them.

 _Damn._ Is the only coherent thought he can make past the intoxicating images of Castiel's deep blue eyes and soft pink mouth. He's so alive, so vibrant. So painfully  _human._

 _Human. Fuck, Benny. Didn't you learn your lesson? Don't you remember what happens to you when you-_ dare he think it-  _fall in love with a human? Don't you remember Purgatory, and how fucking scary it was? The way out, much harder, maybe one or two got out with you. Definitely one, I remember killing Gordon, twice, and now he's alive, can't be a coincidence. He's gonna go after Cas._ His inner voice remains critical.  _He's gonna go after him, and you're gonna be too afraid to admit you may just be gay for the little bird to save him. What would be so wrong with it, anyway? He makes you feel wanted, needed,_ human.  _You can't throw that away because your so fucking butch. You need to stop Gordon, and you need to fess up to Cas. You can't spend the rest of your life chasing your tail._ Benny sighed.  _Where was Cas going? Would I really chase after him to tell him I- yes. I would._ The pull would bring him south, and he would decide it was a good time to visit the old family homestead in Louisiana.

Benny closed the door to his truck when he was seated in the driver's seat.  _Ah, fuck it_ had been how he expressed his forthrightness about kissing Cas the first time.  _Ah, fuck it_ is how he expresses his forthrightness about driving cross country to tell Cas that he's in love with him.

And really, there's not other way but  _ah, fuck it._


	6. Adrenalize

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~Get a little bit higher,  
> So we can fall til we bleed  
> Push a little bit harder  
> Pull me into the speed  
> So tell me, can you feel this  
> Come into my dream  
> Are you ready to awaken?  
> Are you ready to feed?  
> Cause I need to feel~

Dean pulls into the parking lot of a small, if not quaint, motel in Carenco, Louisiana. We'd found a case, and Dean thinks it's a revenant. Sam doesn't quite agree, and I'm buried too deeply in my mind to consider any other.

We get dressed up, suit and tie, to question the victim's family. I've got on my trench coat, which is starting to feel like a counseling session, giving me a sense of peace and security. I always feel a little more like myself when I've got it on.

Dean glances at me when we arrive at the victim's house, and my ears perk when there's a soft rustle by the house. I nod to Dean, silently telling him that he and Sam can go in, that I'll handle it. He nods back, and knocks on the door. I put up my guard and turn toward the source of the sound. Slowly, my hand slips my gun from its holster, and I inch to the sound and slip behind the house. I see quick movement out of the corner of my eye and quickly shift my gaze. I feel a hand move over my mouth and pull me back, and I aim behind me.

"I hope that's a gun." I hear whispered in my ear.

_Damn it, Benny._ I lower it and turn, glaring.

"It's good to see you, too." He grins, and I can't help but to smile back.

"What are you doing here?" I ask him, and he tilts his head.

"Thought to visit the old family home." He then adjusts my tie, eyebrow raised. "Your tie is backwards." I look down.

"Of course it is." I mutter before turning my gaze back to him. "So, any reason you're standing right here? Decided to startle me and risk decapitation?" He laughs, and his smile widens, reaching his eyes.

"You may find this a bit forward, little bird, but I firmly believe that I find myself to be unmistakably in love with you." My eyes reach his again, struck into silence from his words.  _In love with you._ It takes me a while to gather my bearings, and the worry is obvious in his eyes.

"Oh, thank God." I whisper. Confusion replaces the worry, and I lean in, resting my forehead on his shoulder. "I seem to find myself in a similar situation." I laugh, and he kisses my hair.

"That's good to hear, little one." He mutters and kisses me again. I step away and pause for a moment.

"I should be going now... Dean might be worried..." I say, eyes darting to the house. Benny nods.

"I'll be seeing you later then." He mutters and presses another kiss to my hair before I step away and meet my brothers for questioning.

}-= **x** =-{

It was, in fact,  _not_ a revenant, no matter how many signs were pointing toward it. It happened that the family we questioned were actually psychopaths who tried to kill us. To quote my brother: "Demons I get. People are crazy." I breathe out a sigh of relief upon arrival to the motel, collapsing into a chair, only after refusing to join Dean for his tirade of "good booze and hot women," his, seemingly only, idea for celebration. My idea seems, for now, a little less alcoholic and a little less sexual. I plan on stopping by Benny's old house. Maybe to say goodbye. Maybe to say see you later. Hopefully not goodbye.

I walk, mostly because Dean has the car, and reach the house by around 9-sh. I knock and lean against one of the columns that holds up the balcony above the porch. Benny opens the door, and I smile and wave. I can't help but to notice how his eyes light up when he sees me.

"I hope you don't mind." I say, arms folding over my chest, leaning comfortably against the column.

"Not a problem at all." He grins.

}-= **x** =-{

We end up going back to the motel, after talking a little at the house. Mostly about family, and I talk a bit about being a hunter, then he talks about being a vampire. I tell him about my past, about discovering how I'm a fallen angel. He grins, says that he always knew I was too good to come from Earth. Once there, Benny kisses me again, a hungry, rough kiss, and I kiss him back, just as rough. His hands move to my back, moving up, shaping my shoulder blades, kneading my arms. It's like he's painting the shape of my body in his mind. I feel his tongue run against the seam of my lips, and I open my mouth. He tastes me, as I him. He slips his hands over the buttons of my shirts, undoing each as he goes, and my hands move up his arms. I shrug off my shirt, then slip my hands beneath his coat and push it to the floor. He growls then, the first time I'd heard him do so, and he takes off his shirt. He then pushes me against the wall and kisses me again. Hands in my hair, with mine between his shoulders. I move us away from the wall and toward the bed. I break the kiss and pull him with me, eyes locked. When we kiss again, he's lying on top of me. His hips move against mine, mine pushing back against his, and his mouth greedily kisses my neck. I press him against me, on hand on his neck, one on his lower back, as I kiss his shoulder, a soft whisper compared to what he gives me. I hear an animalistic growl deep in his throat as he moves, kissing up my jaw, kissing my cheeks, my mouth.

"Castiel." He sighs against my lips, moving his hands, stroking down my back, down my side, and rolls me on top of him. I straddle his hips, and he pulls me down. We kiss again, briefly, and he pulls me underneath him again. He pulls back, and runs a hand through my hair. I look over him. No doubt I look just as disarrayed. His gaze is laced with a burning fire as he kisses me again. I feel his hands trail down my torso, slipping toward my pants, fiddling with the belt. I pill his hips closer, my knee pushes his legs apart. It isn't long until we're both lost in a mass of tangled blankets and limbs.

Benny kisses my neck, afterwards, and I hum. I relax against him, treasuring the precious feeling of his arms around me. He kisses my hair as I close my eyes.

"G'night, love." He mutters, and a tired smile reluctantly tugs on my mouth, before I feel myself overtaken by sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~Come a little bit closer before we begin  
> Lemme tell you how I want it  
> And exactly what I need  
> I'm here for one drug  
> I'm only here for one thing  
> So come on and tell me,  
> Can you fly like you're free  
> Cause I need to feel~


	7. Our Precious Utopia

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not dead!

First comes a jiggle of keys in the lock. Benny barely notices. He has his eyes closed, arms wrapped around Castiel. The door opens, and his arms tighten. He figures that, if he's going to die, he's going to take as much time living as he possibly can. He keeps his eyes closed and listens to the sound of shoes on wooden floors before there's the soft sound of a duffel being tossed on the other bed, then someone sitting down. Benny's tempted to look, to see which brother is here, but the movement would shift his attention and notice the two shapes in the bed. Castiel's brother lets out a breath and lays down, then the inescapable whisper: "What the Hell?" Benny opens his eyes, but still doesn't move. He buries his face into Castiel's hair, just before Cas rolls onto his back. Benny hesitantly shifts onto his back as well, refusing to look.

"Who the Hell are you?" The brother hisses. Benny takes a deep breath. He can feel a machete going through his neck already.

"'m Benny." He answers before finally looking over. "You must be Sam. I've heard a bit about you. I'll take it that you  _can_ convince a butcher to go vegan." He's found that he tends to talk more when he's about to die.

" _You're_ Benny?" Sam sits back up then. "What are you doing here? With Cas? Did you...?" Benny sits up a little more, making sure the blanket is covering him.

"Let's just say that Cas and I had some good quality bonding time." He flashes a quick smile, and Sam purses his mouth.

"...When did this happen?" He knits his brows and looks between Benny and Cas.

"I'd have to say it started when I saved his life." Benny muses, running a hand through Cas's hair.

"Why did you do that anyway?" Sam turns a little to face Benny.

"I saw them when they surrounded him. I watched as he fought them, swinging and fighting, a whole lot of blood, and when they struck him unconscious with an old pipe from behind. I hid from their sight while they took him to the captive room, and I watched while they bound him. The leader stayed behind." He glances down at Cas again. "He said something to Cas, too quiet for me to hear, and since Cas was unconscious, he wouldn't remember. It was important, I could tell by the way he curled over Cas. Some kind of secret that Cas needed to know. I waited until he left, then I searched the room for the keys to free him. That was about the time one of you started fighting the vampires that attacked Cas outside, and the time Cas woke up. By then, I'd found my weakness." Benny pauses, and his hand moves from Cas's hair to his chest, resting over his heart. "I could feel the ecstasy of Castiel's heart in his chest. I could feel it beating, and it made me alert, still makes me alert. I'm afraid Castiel is my weakness, but that doesn't mean I won't fight like Hell to make sure he lives the life he deserves." Sam nods.

"I'm glad you did what you did, Benny." He says. "But what are you doing here? Why are you still around?"

"He needs me. Whether he cares to admit it or not."

}-= **x** -={

_I feel a hand on my chest, and, full of panic, I quickly look to whomever touched me. A man, closely cut blond hair, blue eyes, is standing over me, and he's fiddling with a key in the lock of my shackles. I'm tempted to ask him why he's here, why he's helping me, but I can't get anything out. He holds a finger to his mouth, making me immediately praise my lack of words. My shackles are undone, and the man hauls me up, putting me solidly on my feet. It's Benny. It's always Benny, and he kisses me._

_"You're my weakness." He whispers in my ear, placing his hand back over my heart._

_But the explosion comes, it always comes. The world around us is a mass of yellows and oranges, paired with red and white and some purple._

}-= **x** =-{

Awake. I stay still and silent for a moment, recovering from my reoccurring dream. Beside me, I can feel Benny, my anchor, a reassuring presence. I feel his arm wrap around me and pull me closer.

"And what about you?" It isn't Benny that says it, but I'd know my brother's voice anywhere.

"I need him." At that moment, I can't help but wonder what the context of this confession is.

"But you said he's your weakness." My heart skips. He actually said that? Not just in my dream? I turn to hear better, and Benny adjusts his arm around me.

"Doesn't mean I don't. Doesn't mean I can't. In my delusional mind, I like to see Cas and myself as two lost, wandering souls, and from what I've seen, I'm right. We are. But the funny thing is, we've found each other, and we're not lost anymore. He's like an anchor. Not only my weakness, but my strength, and I need him. I've seen it in his eyes. He needs me." I gain no answered from my mind about why Benny is pouring his heart out and bearing his soul to Sam. I'm surprised when he slips himself deeper into the blankets, and I can hear Sam rise from the other bed.

"It was good talking to you, Benny." He says, and I can hear his voice move toward the door.

"So it was, Sam." The door closes, and Benny presses a kiss on my brow. "You can't fool me, Cas." I can hear him grinning. "No one sleeps that still, not even you." I decide to stay quiet and hear him laugh at the pitiful attempt. Benny shifts so that he holds me against his chest. "Well, if you're gonna be stubborn and sleepy, might as well be so in your nice warm bed." He moves away from me, and I have to restrain myself from reaching out to him. An attempt in which I fail, because I find myself with my arms around his neck. I know he's grinning. "I can't stay for too long if I want to keep my head, okay?" I bury my face in his chest.

"Just don't go, not yet. Please." I mutter, and Benny's arms pull me closer and hold me tighter. He kisses my forehead again.

"Not yet." He agrees.


	8. Two Minutes to Midnight

_The killer's breed or the demon's seed,_   
_The glamour, the fortune, the pain,_   
_Go to war again, blood is freedom's stain,_   
_But don't you pray for my soul anymore._

 

I wake up again and no longer feel Benny beside me. There's a dark shape in the room, a human shape, but I can't see if it's Sam, Dean, or Benny. I sit up, leaning on my elbows. The shape freezes, and I can feel eyes on me. Too short to be Sam, too small to be Benny.

"Dean?" I whisper, and the shape comes closer. It hushes me, and I frown. "Really? You're quieting me?" The shape reaches out and puts a hand over my mouth. It's not Dean. I can tell by the smell of the hand. The moment it covers my mouth, my nose is flooded with the scent of blood. Not Dean. The shape, whomever it is, hushes me again, as the world slowly fades to black.

}-= **x=-** {

Dean's headache only grows worse when Sam pulls up in the Impala. He massages his temple as he gets into the passenger seat of the car, just as Sam checks his phone.

"Shit." Sam mutters, and Dean glances over.

"What?"

"It's Gordon." His voice grows quiet. "He says the game is on." Dean takes the phone from Sam.

_The game is on._

"The fuck does that mean?" He shakes his head as Sam takes the phone back.

"Not giving you the Reader's Digest, Dean. And how the Hell should I know? Gordon's got more than a few loose screws."

"More loose screws than the Bates we took out yesterday." Dean nods before looking to the back seats, noticing the lack of the literal sass that followed them. "Call Cas." He says.

"Who knows if he'll pick up? Last I saw, he was asleep." Sam begins to scroll through his contacts and calls Cas, putting it on speaker. It rings once... twice... thrice... four times... and goes to voice mail. Dean looks at Sam for a moment before hitting redial, only to have the phone ring out again.

"Something happened, Sam. Gordon's trying to mess with us, yeah? What if that sonuva bitch went after Cas." He took a deep breath. "Drive back to the motel, Sammy." Sam nods and does as Dean said. The moment the Impala slows in front of the motel, Dean leaps out and races to the door. He holds his breath as he opens it.

"Cas." He hisses into the darkness, then turns on the light. The room looks as if a tornado had ripped through it. Drawers open, bags rifled through, Cas gone. "Fuck, Sammy. What did I say?" He turns, and sees Sam muttering to someone on his phone. He leans against the door frame and watches his brother.

"Dammit." Sam mutters, putting his phone away. He glances at Dean. "Someone I thought Cas would be with." He clarifies. "He wants to help." Dean raises an eyebrow.

"What's his name?" He asks.

"...Benny." Sam answers, remembering how Dean acted when he and Cas had first met him. Dean sighs.

"No, Sam. Not  _that_ guy again. Yeah, he saved Cas one time, I'll give him that, but not again..." He then pauses. "Wait... Someone Cas  _would_ be with? I thought he would've stayed back in Wyoming." He sighs and shakes his head. "Y'know what, I don't even fucking care right now. Do you know where he might be?" Sam nods. "Point me."

}-= **x** =-{

There are things to be heard when your eyes refuse to open. Maybe I hit my head, really hard at that. If there's one thing I know immediately, it's that my hands are bound. Though, I'll admit, I'm not exactly surprised. I'm still... Would it be wrong if I were to say that I feel pleased by the fact that they, whoever they are, fear me enough to keep me locked up? And in this state, half in half out of consciousness. I can hear a single thing.

_We're gonna kill the boy king._

}-= **x** =-{

His heart lurched the second Sam had told him. Cas wasn't at the hotel, and Cas, as he'd learned, never went anywhere without his brothers if it meant they would worry about his safety. The deep growl of the muscle car rumbles the house, and Benny stands when the engine stops. The doors open, and Benny leaves his house. He nods to Sam, and finds himself in a staring contest with Dean while they come to the porch.

"At least tell me if you boys have a lead." He says, crossing his arms. Sam nods.

"Did you ever know anyone named Gordon Walker?" He asks. Other then their few brief moments in Purgatory, where Benny and he would fight, he never had any other interaction with Walker. So he shook his head, best keep his days in the afterlife a secret. "Well, we think he kidnapped Cas to get at us. Draw us into a trap." Dean nods. Cas had told him, last night, the Winchesters did everything for family, which seemed to include selling their souls, or letting in the Devil himself.

"I see. How can I help?"

"You can't." Dean answers for Sam, but is hastily pulled aside. The brothers argue for a moment, and Sam says something that makes Dean turn his attention back to Benny.

"You did  _what_ to Cas?" Dean stalks up the stairs, and pushes Benny against the house.

"I only want to help, Dean." He says, raising his brows.

"Yeah, well I bet that's not what you said last night."

"Brother, you don't wanna know what I said last night." Dean backs away.

"Now if you guys are done, I believe we've got a brother to help." Sam intervenes, placing a hand on both Dean's and Benny's shoulders.

"Right..." Dean purses his lips.

"Sam, I believe you're going to have to do some tech stuff with your phone." Benny says then.

"Like what?"

"Given the right things, is it true you could track location?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! I had a malfunction with the device I was writing this on, so updates are going to come a little more frequently, which isn't bad, but I'm also going to have a lot less time to write, and cherish all of it. I have a feeling the rest will come quickly, cause we're at the exciting part.
> 
> Thank you everyone who reads, now you've gotten into raw, not at all looked over writing.
> 
> (And probably less cussing)


	9. Blood

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Blood, blood, blood  
> Pump more through my veins  
> Shut your dirty, dirty mouth  
> I'm not that easy

I struggle against my bindings, wincing at the pain of the cuffs cutting into my wrists. With a deep breath of resignation, I rest my head against the beam, but when the door behind me opens, I turn around to get a better look. It's Gordon, and he's got a knife in his hand.

"You don't know how long," His voice is a strained mutter, and it rattles my bones, "I've wanted to do this." He comes closer and circles me. "How long I've been planning this moment. I thought about this... in Purgatory. I wanted revenge. On you. On Dean. And most importantly, on the boy king brother of yours." I scoff, and turn my head as he circles.

"You don't know how long I've been waiting for a chance to cut off your head myself." I taunt, even though I probably shouldn't. He grabs my neck and lifts me from the floor.

"Try not to scream, Castiel. It's unbecoming." He hand moves higher, and I kick him away, falling to the floor again. Gordon glares at me and puts the knife against my throat. I take a few deep breaths, and delve inside myself, as to not feel the pain, when he bears his teeth.

I still feel it, no matter how much I don't want to. I feel it when Gordon's teeth tear into my throat. I feel it when he forces my blood to pour out and into him. I feel weak as he greedily drinks it. I feel it when his tongue runs along my wound. I open my eyes when he moves away, and he lifts my chin.

"For God's sake, you call yourself a hunter?" He teases, and I can't do much more than look up at him. "What has the world come to, hmm? That something like you can stop the _Apocalypse._ That you can dare call yourself an angel." His fingers tighten on my jaw and jerk my head up. "You are nothing holy, you piece of shit, and you never forget that." He moves back , and I sink to the ground, finding solace in the concrete.

"Just wait until your brothers come. This will be one fascinating reunion." He leaves then, and internally, I sigh in relief. His words didn't jar me, like he'd meant them to. The fuck does he know?

1) I'm a hunter because I kill monsters.

2) I didn't stop the Apocalypse alone.

3) I don't, nor have I ever, openly called myself an angel.

4) I fucking know I'm not holy because I fell.

5) Purgatory did nothing for Gordon Walker cause he's still a douche-bag.

6) I really want to kill him now.

}-= **x** =-{

"What?" Dean squints at the computer screen. The blinking blue dot the shows Gordon's GPS location is miles off from any road, and he finds he suspects Gordon either abandoned the phone in a swamp or something. Or he set up camp away from civilization. Either being a completely understandable choice.

"What." Sam looks at his brother, with a raised brow, wondering what his brother was questioning.

"How the fuck did you do that, Sammy?"

"It's easy, I used some tricks Charlie taught me and hacked into the GPS on Gordon's phone." He shrugs, as if it truly were nothing, but Dean and Benny exchange glances that say otherwise.

"Brother, you're one smart kid." Benny whistles, leaning against the wall.

"Please, don't call me brother." Sam says, standing and closing the laptop. Benny holds up his hands in surrender.

"Whatever you say."

The men leave the motel a few moments later in order to quickly find the location directed by the GPS. The ride there is silent and awkward, but what else would it be when you're searching for your brother with his lover in the back seat?

Sam's eyes flick between the GPS signal and the road, ready to direct Dean in the right direction given the need. The land around them slowly becomes covered in trees and swamp.

"Right up here." He announces, and watches as a small wooden cabin appears in the wilderness. Dean slows the car, and parks just outside. He takes a deep breath. Here they were. Time to get shit rolling.

 

}-= **x** =-{

 _Soft, soft. My arms feel all soft... And my head, god, why is it so light?_ My eyes open.  _God, that light. Blinding..._ Weakly, I held out my arms and examined them. They're covered in blood, but god, I don't even know if it's mine. And blood, I smell it every where. Glancing at the small window near the ceiling, my brow most likely furrowed, I run my tongue over my upper gums, heart clenched in anticipation.

_Well, shit._

They did it, they did it. Now, if I only avoid feeding, I'll be able to turn back. I'm still weak, which means they haven't done anything... Well, other than turn me.

"Looks like Sleeping Beauty's awake again." A big gruff fellow says from the corner, only looking like a shadow to me now, but I can hear it, pumping through his veins. The sweet, sweet life blood.

_NO._

"Aurora." I reply, relaxing against the pillar, the man snarls at me.

"What was that?"

"Sleeping Beauty, her name's Aurora." I smirk and see the man move closer to me.

"You can shut your whore mouth. I don't fucking care if her name's Winston Churchill." He growls, and moves closer, pulling me up. I continue to grin at him.

"Put him down." That's Gordon, just now entering the room. The large man didn't obey, and Gordon came closer swatting his hands away. The man nearly tosses me back onto the floor, and this time, when Gordon lifts me, he's gentle, as if I'm some kind of precious thing he can't afford to break. He smiles then, and I feel a suspicious chill run down my spine.

"You should rest, my boy. There's a long day ahead of you tomorrow."

Something's definitely wrong, cause I find myself with no other option.

 

}-= **x** =-{

The roaring of the Impala's engine stalls, and the boys get out, their movements accompanied by the creaking of doors. Sam takes the lead on the careful walk to the house. The moment he opens the door, a chair collides with his skull in a brisk movement, leaving him to tumble to the floor. Dean and Benny exchange glances, hefting their machetes. Benny begins to whistle "In the Hall of the Mountain King". Inside there are seven men, but Dean quickly ducks the incoming chair and dispatches the man behind the door. His machete cuts quickly through the man's neck, causing a splash of blood to spray the wall behind him, and some of Dean's face. Benny ducks through the door, and attacks one of the charging men, leaving a thin trail of blood on his torso with a swing, then quickly decapitating him.

Dean moves from behind the door as Benny does this and takes down one of the men quickly. Somewhere in the fray, the four remaining men gather around the two, leaving them back to back.

They move slowly now, ducking as a pair while the men take shots, mainly with either blunt weapons or fists, and as they stand again, Dean kicks the feet out from underneath the two men by him. Benny knocks the two men by him over with a rush of his fist into them.

"Leave one alive." Benny advises Dean. "Gordon's obviously gotten smarter."

It wasn't long before three of the men were killed, and one was tied to a chair.

"Now." Dean starts, taking out the Demon Knife. "Let's start with an easy question... Where's my brother?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In other news, Charlie and Sam are bros.
> 
> Also, PLOT TWIST!!! I thought this up and had to include it... Now I have no idea where I'm going with this anymore. Shit's gonna go down, I can tell you that much.
> 
> So much to cover in this chapter *sigh*
> 
> May I suggest you follow my live feed on Tumblr? (xpenemue) or my personal if you don't want to shift through RP: thilbo--bagginshield
> 
> (Fight scene written to "Beautiful Woman Hunter" by Schoolyard Heroes)
> 
> Ideas in the comments would be awesome!!


	10. I Hope You Hurt, So Badly, Baby

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title taken from "All the Pretty Corpses"
> 
> Forewarning of Torture in this chapter.
> 
> "Darling turn me inside out,  
> Destroy me just for fun.  
> Curse my generations dear,  
> Together we shall burn"

I told myself I wouldn't feed. I remember that clearly, but I'm an idiot. I'm an idiot, and I can't say no to him. That urge for rebellion left me as soon as he walked in the room. Gordon Walker is my king, and I will always bow to him.

I am far past the point of no return, but I don't really give a fuck anymore.

 

}-= **x** =-{

_"Let's start with an easy question... Where's my brother?"_

From the beginning, it was painfully obvious to Benny that Dean wears his emotions on his sleeve. And now, it seems that those emotions suddenly vanished. Dean's eyes are hollow as he holds the knife to the man's throat, and the only thing Benny can do is stand back and watch. Cas's brother looks like he'd been to Hell and back, and that he's about to make the man do so as well.

The man laughs at the question.

"Your brother?" He scoffs. "You mean the one we hit with the chair? Cause he's right outside." The man grins cheekily, but that comes to an end when Dean buries the dagger into his arm. He winces and takes in a deep breath. "Oh.." He smirks and looks up at Dean, his grin cold and malevolent. "You mean the one we bled dry." With a scowl, Dean twists the dagger.

"Tell the truth, you fucking liar." He snarls. Benny looks at the two of them, examining them. He can't help but wonder where Dean had picked up his skills in torture.

"That's what he was planning!" The man hisses, and Dean takes his hand off the dagger.

"Who was planning?" He looks the man in his eyes.

"Walker."

There's a flash of something in Dean's eyes- emptiness, some sort of memory- when he finally steps away from the restrained man. "How did you learn this?" His voice is lowered, and he pulls the man's head back, causing him to take in a gasp of pain.

"I overheard him. He was in his office, and I was passin' by. That's it, okay? I heard him say that he was gonna wait until the captive wakes up then bleed the fucker dry." He closes his eyes. "He wasn't even talkin' to no one. I tell you, that Gordon Walker guy's a loon. Now. You gonna kill me or aren't you?"

A wicked smile splits Dean's mouth, and he rips the dagger out of the man's arm.

"Well, you've outlived your usefulness." He hisses before slamming it into the man's chest, who slowly goes limp. Benny watches Dean, just after checking the man's coat and pockets and retrieving a piece of paper -which he examined before putting in his pocket-, step away from him and leave the room. Benny follows, and notices Sam sitting up, wincing and gently rubbing the back of his head where he'd been hit.

"How you feeling, Sammy?" Dean asks, helping his brother up. Sam shook his head.

"Like I just got hit by a train."

"Good, cause Gordon is going to kill Cas and we have to get there before he does." Dean nods and turns away, causing Sam to stare, features creasing in confusion.

"Wait, do you know where to go?" Dean turns back.

"Right here." He holds up the lip of paper, and Sam's expression turns from confusion to aporetic.

"And how did you get that?"

Dean looks back to Benny.

"One of the dead guys." His eyes plead for support, so Benny nods. Sam shrugs and nods to the paper.

"Where to then?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short but hardly a filler, I'm aware. And sorry about the length, but next chapter's all about Cas.
> 
> And I admit, I wrote the torture scene to Florence and the Machine.
> 
> Don't know where I'm going to take this anymore. It was supposed to have a nice little wrapped-up bow ending, and now I don't even know.
> 
> If you've got ideas, about anything, I would love to hear them.
> 
> Thank you all for reading.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and kudos are an author's best friends.


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